Marisa Peer took the stage at the We the Women event in Dubai on Wednesday, addressing a packed audience with a powerful message on the barriers holding women back. A globally renowned therapist and the founder of Rapid Transformational Therapy (RTT), Peer urged women to transform the way they think and speak to themselves in order to reclaim their power. She highlighted societal expectations, self-doubt, and perfectionism as key obstacles that limit potential, and called on women to embrace their flaws, build self-belief, and inspire the next generation to aim higher.
Challenging Gendered Narratives
Peer began her talk by reflecting on the deep-rooted gendered narratives that shape girls from a young age. Recalling her experience with her daughter, she noted, “I used to read her a story Snow White married the handsome prince, Cinderella found the handsome prince and I’d say, ‘Let’s change that.’ I’d say, ‘Well, thanks a lot, but I want to be a journalist. I’m going to film school now. I’ll have time to get married later.’” Peer emphasised the need to replace limiting stories with empowering ones, encouraging young girls to believe they can achieve anything from becoming astronauts to leading nations.
Overcoming Imposter Syndrome and Societal Judgement
One of the key points Peer discussed was the societal judgment that disproportionately affects women. “80 per cent of women have imposter syndrome,” she said, describing a psychological phenomenon where individuals doubt their own abilities despite evidence of their success. She pointed out that while women are judged for their appearance and social roles, men are rarely subjected to the same scrutiny. “No one says to a man, ‘I saw you on TV, I loved your hair,’” she noted.
Peer also explained that women often internalise external pressures, feeling responsible for the well-being of others. “We think about others’ needs all the time. But the most important dialogue you will ever have in your whole life is the dialogue you have with yourself,” she stressed, urging women to take control of their inner voice.
Building Self-Belief and Letting Go of Perfectionism
Encouraging women to embrace their inner strength, Peer recommended replacing self-doubt with positive affirmations. “Learn to say: I’m great, I’ve got this, I’m skilled, I’m doing something amazing,” she advised. “Don’t give that job to someone else don’t ask, ‘What do you think of me? Am I okay?’”
She also shared stories of famous women, such as American actress Elizabeth Taylor, who overcame doubt to achieve greatness. Taylor, Peer recalled, was told she could be an actress but never a movie star. Her response: “It’s not for you to tell me. I’ll show you.” Peer urged women to adopt this “I’ll show you” attitude, refusing to be defined by others’ expectations.
One of the core messages of Peer’s talk was the importance of self-affirmation. She introduced five simple but powerful affirmations: “I’m enough, I matter, I’m significant, I’m worth it, I’m lovable just the way I am.” She stressed that shifting one’s mindset from “I’m not enough” to “I am enough” could have a profound impact on behaviour and overall life satisfaction.
Redefining Flaws and Perfectionism
Peer’s talk also tackled the pressure many women face to be perfect, which she warned often leads to loneliness and unhappiness. “You want to be unhappy? The fastest way is trying to be perfect,” she stated. Instead, she introduced the concept of being “flawsome” embracing imperfection. “People who are perfect are alone. The basis of all friendship is shared vulnerability,” Peer explained.
The Power of Beliefs
Throughout her address, Peer repeatedly stressed the transformative power of beliefs. “We create our thoughts, and our thoughts create us,” she said. “Life is changing so quickly. We must take responsibility for our beliefs, and if you don’t like them, change them.” She reminded the audience that the mind cannot hold conflicting beliefs. “Every thought you think is a blueprint,” she added, urging women to repeat affirmations like “I’ve got this, I’m smart, I’m capable” until they became second nature.
Taking Control of Your Thoughts
In conclusion, Peer encouraged women to take control of their thoughts, as it is the only thing they can truly control. “In a world where we try to control our weight, our home, and the traffic the only thing you can really control is your thinking,” she said. By doing so, she explained, life begins to change dramatically. Happiness and success, according to Peer, start with mastering the mind.
Her closing message was clear: “Self-esteem is what I think of myself. Raising your self-worth, self-esteem, and self-belief is not anyone else’s job it’s yours.” When women elevate themselves, she concluded, the whole world joins them.
For further insights into empowering women, you can read about how Reema Al Khatib was honoured at the Dubai Positive Women Award.
